


Escaping from loneliness

by thedarkrescuer



Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: F/M, Friends with benefits of sorts-to lovers, this fic feels like a character study of sorts so bear with me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-26
Updated: 2020-01-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:07:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22412233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedarkrescuer/pseuds/thedarkrescuer
Summary: AU. It was supposed to happen once, one time, one night. Squall let it slip something to Selphie that he wasn't supposed to. But once they both find out they are assigned and dispatched to the same mission the next day, Squall realizes he cannot escape from dealing with the consequences of his actions.
Relationships: Squall Leonhart/Selphie Tilmitt
Comments: 8
Kudos: 8





	1. Stress in solitude

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I'm merely having fun writing them. 
> 
> I would like to thank Ridja for being such an MVP and life savior for beta-ing this story.

  
Squall had quite the day, let alone _quite the_ _week_. Earlier that week there was their Field Exam that would decide his future, and he swiftly passed and got admitted as SeeD. _Finally. But that was just the beginning,_ he realized, remembering how mercilessly he and Seifer had scarred each other’s faces.   
  
Today, making now 7 days after the field exam, he had to attend the graduation ball. Squall didn’t understand why he had to go, but it was a part of his obligations so he didn’t complain when asked to be there. To him, such an event dwelled to just a bunch of people getting drunk, talking, laughing, and he was alone for the most of the time. Except when the mysterious girl who approached him and forced him to come out of his comfort zone and dance… that was an unexpected one. Generally the Balamb Garden girls avoided him because of his coldness and distant behavior. Tonight was different though, but it seemed that this girl wasn’t from the Garden or she would’ve known of his fame.  
  
They danced in what was a very messy, clumsy start, and everything fell perfectly together at the end of the song. Only for her to quickly ditch him as soon as she found something else more interesting to do. Typical. People were usually like this. That was one of the things Squall wanted to avoid the most: someone just using him and leaving him behind to lick his wounds all alone.   
  
_“Pathetic. Since when have I cared that much?”_ _  
_ _  
_And on the top of it all, Instructor Trepe, who seemed to have a special talent to piss him off, decided to pour her heart out to him in an uncharacteristically manner; leading him to a place where students usually used as a ‘make-out spot’ after curfew, it only send Squall all the wrong signs. Even if she excused herself and said she just wanted someone to listen, she still had to _order_ him to do so beforehand, knowing perfectly well he would refuse to hear as soon as she started on the subject, if he wasn’t under her orders.   
  
What ticked him off the most was that Instructor Trepe, for all her willingness to deal with and put it up with his aloof behavior, she liked to assume that she knew him better than anyone, including himself. That was something he didn’t like; someone intruding on his space and trying and forcing him to open himself up. What for? For whom? It would be much better if everyone knew how to take care of themselves.  
  
Her words stayed with him, ringing off his ears as he made his way to the Dormitory area, walking in the silent and vast corridors of Balamb Garden.  
  
 _“It’s not like everyone can get by on their own, you know?”_ _  
_ _  
_She seemed to be talking for herself at first, but that was also an indirect way to tell him that he, too, was cut of the same cloth as she was.  
  
He sighed deeply. Who said it has to be? Why did he care? Why did _she_ try to force her own issues on him, expecting a sympathetic shoulder to cry on, especially _his?_ She should know better by now, how he did his best to keep his distance from anyone. She was in Garden with Squall for almost 8 years, claimed to know him but still insisted on making the same mistakes.   
  
“I _shouldn’t let it affect me this much. I wanna go to sleep. End this day for once and all. Maybe by tomorrow I can start things anew away from here. SeeD members always get their first mission soon after graduation, so it might be my chance.”_ \- he thought as he made his way to the Dorms corridor, and found a small figure ahead waiting for him in the dead of the night. That silhouette and hairstyle were unmistakable, it was the new transferred student, the girl who graduated with him, Zell and another cadet guy he simply forget the name… it started with N, he wondered briefly, but didn’t pay much attention  
  
He did remember this girl’s name, though. Selphie. He knew her for a week at best. She was a strangely cheerful figure to such a place like the Garden, it was hard to picture her at first in a mercenary dominated field, but seeing how she dealt pretty well with the orders she was given in the field test, this girl had more to her beyond her appearance. She wasn’t as bad as he thought at first. She was… _alright?_ , he guessed. She loved to ask him to sign in to be a part of the Festival Committee, but he wasn’t really interested. He had to admit it though, she was very passionate about it despite being a newcomer. He always wondered why, she would find any opportunity to get anyone to join, even though Balamb wasn’t really her home like Trabia was. And while he had brushed her off about this particular subject, he admired her passion about it and she was a fine company to stay around; not nearly as loud as Zell, not as pretentious as his former instructor.  
  
He didn’t want to admit it, but maybe this girl was the most likeable person he had met in quite a while.  
  
Squall tensed at first, imagining that he probably had to deal yet again with someone else’s complaints, was ready to dispatch the girl to her own dormitory, but seeing she was still in her SeeD uniform from the ball, she likely had something important to say. Fine, he would let her. _Let’s see how this goes, I want to sleep and soon._ _  
_ _  
_“Hiya!” she said in a happy voice “I was asked to find you and tell you about your new dorm area! You know, now we’re SeeDs we were relocated to new, private rooms!” she chirped, clasping her hands together “That means you’re getting a brand new bedroom tonight! How does that sound?”  
  
“Sounds good.” _Fantastic, in fact. I could use some privacy,_ he let out a discreet sigh of relief, in the hopes she didn’t notice. Too bad though, she did.  
  
“You look terrible, though.” Selphie noted with a furrowed brow, and grabbed her own chin thoughtfully.   
  
“Do I?” he replied, absently-minded.   
  
“Yup. C’mon, I’m going to show you where it is, so you don’t get lost and sleep elsewhere before getting there.”  
  
“Thought you’re the new girl here, not the other way around.” She let out a cute giggle in response.   
  
“I’m just returning the favor you did earlier this week! That’s my way to thank you, also.” The petite girl replied with a warm smile. This one, seemed genuine enough to make Squall think about their encounter; he could’ve brushed her off or ignored her from the get go, but it costed zero effort to do that for a newbie. Besides, she was nicer than he thought.  
  
“Let’s go, this way!” she pointed out to the other end of the corridor and started to hum to herself a cheerful tone. Squall arched one eyebrow to that, but let it slide.  
  
  
\-----  
  
  
As soon as they arrived in front of his new bedroom, Selphie gave him the keys.   
  
“Tah-daah! There you go, you’re in your new home, now.”  
  
“Not for too long, I believe.”  
  
“You mean your first mission?”  
  
“Yeah…” He opened the door and got in, checking out to see his surroundings, and appreciated the freshness of the air, the scent of new furniture and his things were neatly distributed, including his Gunblade case.   
  
“Ow… when you think about it, that sounds sad.” She furrowed her brows reflectfully.   
  
“But that’s just the way it is. We graduate, get new orders, and when we’re 20 we are dispatched to the world, make room for new cadets and new SeeDs. You know that too, don’t you?” He simply stated, and she nodded.  
  
“Yup, I just thought it’s a sad way to look at things. Think this way then: you got to enjoy your new room as much as you can tonight! Sleep sound, and good luck with your mission tomorrow!” Selphie waved goodbye as she made her way out of his door, when suddenly Squall felt the urge to call her.  
  
“Hey.”  
  
“Hmm? Yes?”  
  
“Thanks, and…” he made an awkward pause, and for a minute she looked at him expectantly. Was this guy she just met going to ask her for something else? It was past midnight and she was pretty sure he looked tired when they met in the Dorm corridor. He’s probably just wanting to sleep.  
  
“I told you I was retributing the favor, wasn’t I? And you’re welcome, too.”   
  
“-Stay.”  
  
“I’m sorry?”  
  
“You had all the trouble of waiting for me so I thought…” _The hell am I thinking?? I want her to stay but even I don’t know why. Do I want her company? She’s not bad, but I’ve known her for one week and-”_ _  
_ _  
_She turned on his direction and smiled sympathetically at him. “Okay, sure! Can I go in then?”  
  
“... Y-Yeah.” Squall made way for her to enter his room and get comfortable “You can sit in the chair if you want to.”  
  
“Excuse me, then!” She reached for the chair in front of his brand new desk, pulled in front of his bed and sat, without noticing how an awkwardly silent Squall stood next to the door before closing it and making his way to the bed.   
  
For a few minutes, they stood like that, sitting silently in front of each other, no words said or needed. Selphie looked at him expectantly at first, waiting for the words to come out but nothing. She then glanced around, brushing the back of her head with her left hand - that’s the cue Squall needed to realize that he was being probably weird and inconvenient with this new girl and making a fool of himself.   
  
_Shit, this was a bad idea. I have nothing to say, yet I could really use some company now, and she was around, she’s not annoying as I imagined, but she’s probably think I’m a creep and-_ _  
_ _  
_“Hey, Squall.”  
  
“Hmm?”  
  
“You look troubled.” She said with a soft look in her eyes. She had pretty and big green eyes, that was the first time Squall noticed them.  
  
He shook his head and ran a hand over his face, sighing deeply, avoiding eye contact.   
  
“Was that obvious?”  
  
“Pretty much.” She nodded.  
  
Squall rested his forearms in each leg, and still avoiding looking up at her, he started. “I had a really shitty week.” _And that doesn’t even begin to cover it._  
  
“Oh!” She inclined her body forward, Squall noticed that much by just listening to the chair grunting in front of him. At least she was making an effort to stay and also being nice. Way too nice, he realized. More than he deserved. Guilt started to creep in his mind and dwell in his chest painfully as he remembered of all the stuff that happened during the week, his Instructor’s words, and his own beliefs about independence and self-reliance.  
  
“Don’t worry! I won’t tell anyone, I can keep any secret!”  
  
“Says the girl I met just this week.”  
  
“Heeey! It i _s_ true! I swear by my beloved Teddy Bear I left behind in Trabia, I won’t tell anyone so you don’t get in trouble!”  
  
“Wait, do you have a Teddy Bear?” He arched a brow, changing the subject and finally glancing up to her. He caught her sudden blush and found it hilarious how she started to flail her hands.  
  
“It’s NOT what you think, okay? I DO have a Teddy but he stayed home and it’s been years I left him in the care of children from the junior class!”  
  
He snorted “It’s alright, I was just teasing.” _Why am I teasing her, though? It feels surreal to imagine a teenager like her with teddy bears, but then again… she does look like someone who would have one, even now._ _  
_ _  
_“I knew you had some sense of humor in you!” She pointed at him in a fake accusatory voice, trying to hide her embarrassment. He simply shrugged in response, with a small smile gracing his lips for the first time in what felt a long, long while.  
  
He did smile that night, too, Squall recalled, soon after he finished dancing with that raven-haired girl, but made sure to bury that memory away from his current thoughts.  
  
“But really, you can tell me anything. Is there any trouble with an Instructor?”  
  
 _Spot-on. How perceptive is she? Or am I too obvious? Or she already knows me better than I thought?_ _  
_ _  
_“Sorta. But there’s more.”  
  
There he was, with someone being willingly empathetic with him, willing to listen to his troubles when he had just told his Instructor to go talk to a wall minutes ago.  
  
 _I’m a fucking hypocrite, I know it. But screw it. Screw this. Just this once and I won't do It again._ _  
_ _  
_ _“_ Well, I…”   
  
“Don’t worry, tell things at your pace. I can wait.” She placed a hand over her chest and reaffirmed with a smile.  
  
“You must be tired, too. I mean, there was the graduation ball, you said you’re organizing the School Festival, I’m sure your day was just as busy. I’m just being an ass-”  
  
“I don’t think that wanting or needing to vent means you’re an ass, Squall. And yeah, I’m almost dead tired and would love to fall in my bed and sleep soundly ‘til tomorrow, but you know what? I can wait and my new comfy bed can also wait. I can enjoy it when I’m back from my first mission! I think you need this more than I do. So let it out!” She spread her arms fully as if emphasising the size of Squall’s problems.   
  
He wanted to snort at the way she put it in words, but appreciated every single one of them. Maybe this was what Quistis meant? He didn’t deserve it, half of what Selphie was offering him, he wondered. But he was too deep in this now to care and was going to take the girl’s gentle offer. _  
_ _  
_“Okay, fine.” - He inhaled, deeply, looking down to his shoes, realizing that he could really use taking them off; he spent the entire day with those and his feet were really hurting, further enforcing how tiresome that particular week was to him.  
  
“...I uh…” _C’mon, think of what was stressing you so much up until now. Ah, I think I remember now._ “...My Instructor was getting under my skin, she did this long before she got her license, but then it got worse after I was assigned to her class.”   
  
He looked up to see Selphie listening to him intently, her brows furrowed slightly. Good. That only encouraged him to go further.  
  
“Today was the worst I had to deal with her, so far. She’s…” _Here comes the embarrassing part_ “...asked me to go to a make-out spot in the Training Center with the intent of venting her frustrations, but who knows what else she wanted from me.” Squall wasn’t the one to say he had experience in relationships, but he wasn’t as dense as to not realize that Trepe had second intentions with him for a while, by now.   
  
“And that’s not all of it, she acts like she knows me, that she can read me like a fucking open book, and yet she failed to realize that I didn’t want to listen to her troubles and told her to talk to a wall-” _Stop, stop, stop it. You’re making the matters worse. Why should she sympathize with you after you just confessed you didn’t want to do the same to someone else?? “_ Dammit. I shouldn’t have asked you to stay, you probably think I’m terrible now.”  
  
Selphie paused, looking at him with a serious face, trying to come up with something to say.  
  
“Look, I know it wasn’t nice of you to act like that, but if you’re so worked up, I guess she wasn’t being nice with you either. I guess everyone is at fault here.” she simply shrugged.  
  
“You don’t think I’m a terrible person?” _And maybe unworthy of all of this conversation._  
  
“Nah. Maybe _a bit_ of an ass.” She giggled “But definitely not the meanie you made yourself to me now.”  
  
“How so?” He asked, genuinely curious.  
  
“You do seem this cool-looking guy and distant at first, but you helped me when I needed it. And you could’ve left me to my own devices and figure out alone, but no, you didn’t. The fact you’re now saying these things shows to me that you’re not ‘all-that-bad-as-you-wanted-to-look’ like kinda of person.” She quoted the last part with her hands for emphasis. “So go ahead. I bet there’s more to your week than this.”  
  
He sighed in relief, relaxing his shoulders as if lifting a heavy weight from them and from his chest. Maybe that week wasn’t particularly _that_ bad as he thought it was. Not when he made the right decision to help this girl, and now to ask her to stay. _Maybe_ not all was lost. Or maybe he was just desperately craving attention and this girl is willing to give it to him and she’s right there, right now.  
  
 _I don’t want to say out loud, not even to myself, but I’m enjoying this. The company, the attention. How… how long have I been starving for it and denied the same to others around me?_

  
 _...Damn. Maybe Quistis' right._ _  
_ _  
_ Squall willed himself to continue his ‘tale’ now that the worst part had passed.   
  
“ Also...I had ‘this’ accident early this week, just before you arrived.” He pointed out to his freshly-made scar from his forehead to the left side of his nose. “Courtesy of that guy you probably know as the Squad B Leader, Seifer.” To this, the girl answered with a wide-eyed look of disbelief, bringing both hands to cover her mouth.   
  
“That’s… That’s pretty bad. That SUCKS! And here I thought Seifer was a nice guy!” she said angrily, frowning in disappointment.   
  
“What made you think he was nice?” Squall asked, arching a brow; everyone who crossed paths with Seifer either imagined he was cool or annoying, there was no in-between with that guy. Niceness though, was a first to him.   
  
“Well… he sounded fun, I think.”   
  
“‘Fun’.” He repeated, hiding his obvious disbelief.   
  
“Yeah, I mean, his looks, the way he talked about his ‘romantic dream’ and all. And he congratulated us for our graduation, so I didn’t think he was all that bad. But sure, it still sucks what he did to you! And the scar doesn’t make much difference to me, you see. I thought you’re a big stud since I met you! I-I mean-!!!” To this, Selphie covered her mouth with both hands and blushed madly, while Squall looked at her in disbelief, his own mouth gaping a little. Did she really think that of him?   
  
She suddenly got up, all flustered and fussy, tried to place the chair back where it was as quickly as she could and go away from him. Selphie knew she made a little show of embarrassing herself in front of this guy, even though he was nothing but gentle to her. But maybe he would think of her as incredibly shallow, and only willing to listen because he was handsome - _he is, but that’s not the point,_ she told herself as she got all worked up for nothing. Because as soon as she tried to go for the door, she felt his hand on her wrist, grabbing her and preventing her from leaving.   
  
Selphie froze in place, not believing in what just happened. He should’ve let her go, he was definitely not interested in trouble, and definitely NOT interested on her, and that sounded even more absurd the more she repeated in the back of her head-   
  
“Stay.” He said, and her mind went blank for a solid minute, unsure of what to do, heart beating fast as it filled with a strange warmth she never felt before, but welcomed it nonetheless.   
  
  



	2. Stay for now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> notes: This chapter contains explicit content. In the future I might not do lengthy chapters like these dedicated only to explicit content and make use of fade to black. Though I DO recommend you to read it even if you want to skip it because this is not a PWP. I'm trying to explore another side of Squall's character, so you might miss his characterization if you choose not to read. I'm pretty sure it will sound strange at first, you might see Squall as OOC for doing this, and I won't blame you but I'm asking you readers to stay tuned and see where this is going. I promise there is a reason why I'm leading things this way.  
> Thank you for reading so far and enjoy chapter 2! :)

“Stay.” He said those words again. Thrice that night, now. Selphie’s stomach fluttered at the sound of his voice, the touch of his gloved hand on her sleeved arm. She was afraid to look back at him, and find something else in his face, or realize that she was the one who was imagining things, and this hand grabbing her arm wasn’t what she thought-   
  
Suddenly she felt her body being pushed back and she spun around on instinct, being pulled close, way too close, to Squall’s own body, her face next to his chest. Selphie looked up only to find that he looked just as confused and lost as she was. Maybe he was wondering if this was a mistake, but the truth was that this brooding boy was suddenly desperate to hide his own embarrassment at his sudden attitude towards her, but to no avail.    
  
_ I probably look ridiculous doing it but… Screw it. I  _ _ want  _ _ this. _   
  
_ I’ve never wanted anything too much in my life so far. Not after… Not after Sis left. Let me have this. _   
  
_ I’ll probably regret everything by tomorrow, but so be it.  _ _   
_ _   
_ He lowered his head to her level, unsure at first if he should gently lift her chin up like those cheesy movies and magazines the girls loved it so much, but he wanted to show Selphie he  _ wanted her. _ Selphie, on the other hand, made things a little bit clumsy at first by giving him a dazzled look, still pondering if this was all real or a dream, until she decided to try her luck and be on the tip of her toes to reach him, lips parting slightly and tentatively.    
  
Squall was pretty sure his heart was beating so fast that they both could actually hear it. He closed the distance and their lips found each other in a shy, chaste kiss. She felt warm and soft against his mouth, further inviting him to want more. It was an innocent gesture at first but this only sparked the fire dormant on him, and he grabbed her by the waist, pulling their bodies so close he could feel the rising and falling of her chest against his, and Selphie obliged by parting her pinky lips enough to give room for his tongue to meet hers in a inexperienced mess, teeth clattering at first until they found the right pacing. She placed her hands on his back, pulling tightly the fabric of his leather jacket, pressing further against him.   
  
They only stopped to give each other room to breathe, desperate for some air to fill their lungs that they remained that way for a while, foreheads touching and eyes closed. Squall felt dizzy and anxious but this  _ \- this kind of warmth  _ \- he craved it so much, he was  _ starving _ . It was like pouring his very soul out to someone, exposing himself in such a vulnerable way it was scary, something he avoided for so long and now was desperate to compensate for the lost time. He looked at Selphie expectantly, waiting for her response, for her to push him away, but she seemed to be just as caught up and involved in it as he was, in their tight embrace when she glanced up with her pretty green eyes; the kiss that came next was what sealed definitively where their hearts and bodies were that night - with each other.    
  
They moaned almost together against their crashing mouths, and Squall’s hands wandered on Selphie’s back, experimenting with the feeling of sharing that kind of intimacy with someone, testing his grounds. Selphie noticed his hands sliding over the fabric of her SeeD uniform tentatively, caressing her body, and then quickly removing it from her buttocks when he realized where he was going; Selphie wanted to laugh but only smiled against his wet lips, moaning softly when she felt his hands pulling over her skirt, their bodies moving towards his bed - with Squall guiding her unconsciously and she letting herself go with him. He gracelessly stopped when he realized they were just in front of his bed, and that he could have her pinned down in the cushion if he wanted, but the thought of doing that scared him.  _ This is too much, too forward, she will be angry at me, she will leave and never come back- _ _   
_ _   
_ “Squall?” She asked, almost breathlessly. He looked at her with his blue grey eyes, his lost gaze showing how he was feeling about what they were doing, where they were going, what was about to happen.  _ I want it. I want this. But what about her? Better stop before it’s too late and we both regret it. _ _   
_ _   
_ He expected her to leave him after being left hanging without a proper answer, but what came next was everything but; Selphie held both his hands gently, and placed each on her breasts, pressing her own hands against his, enforcing the touch, that she wanted this, she wanted them to go further. Now it was  _ her  _ turn of looking at him expectantly, afraid of rejection and hurt and pain.   
  
“You sure?”   
  
“Y-Yes.”   
  
Squall inhaled deeply, bracing himself for what he was about to do.  _ With an almost virtual stranger, no less,  _ he pondered, guilt creeping back in his mind, but the hunger, the  _ raw need _ was louder, stronger than everything he felt. Shaking his thoughts out of his head, he placed one hand on the back of her neck, pushing Selphie softly to yet another kiss, tentatively squeezing one breast with the other hand. Squall laid her gently on his bed, carefully, briefly breaking the kiss to make sure she was comfortable. He reminded himself to kick off his shoes, taking off his jacket and gloves next. Selphie imagined it could be a good idea to remove his belts - he had  _ way too many _ \- to help him get undressed easily, and started to untie them. Squall seemed surprised and a bit taken aback at first, but eventually helped her when he realized he was starting to get hard between his legs.    
  
Selphie herself blushed brightly as she was starting to undo the zipper of her uniform jacket, realizing that it would be the first time a man would see her breasts or her naked form. She gulped as she tried to brush these thoughts away and free herself from her clothing, until she was only with her underwear, joining Squall who was just on his boxers by now. They both looked at each other expectantly, unsure of what to do next. It finally dwelled on him his own inexperience, and it seemed to Squall that she, too, was a virgin. He inwardly thanked Hyne for it, since it avoided any further embarrassment falling on him alone. At least they would be together in this.    
  
_ It should be something more special for the girls, at least it’s what I was told to believe in. And here is she, willing to give her first time to someone like me. What.. Does she see in me?  _ _   
_ _   
_ She gave him a shy smile in response, redness creeping on her cheeks making her even cuter as she looked at him with adoring green eyes, bringing one hand to caress his cheek, and then tracing gently the scar on his face, placing a kiss on it next.   
Stunned by her gesture, he blushed just as much as the girl in front of him.  _ Maybe she sees something I cannot see myself. _ _   
_ _   
_ “Are you afraid?” He blurted it out, before he could think of something better to say or even do.   
  
“A little.” She admitted, fidgeting a bit.  _ Me too,  _ Squall thought, yet the look in her eyes was resolute and kind and loving. The kind of look he was not used to seeing in anyone in his life so far. The last time someone had loved him, it was his Sis, and hers was a totally different type of affection, one that made him feel happy and safe, and Squall craved that safety more than he was willing to admit it.   
  
He knew it was impossible that this girl would _ love _ him in just one week, but he was secretly glad that she was willing to give him  _ something _ that resembled it; _ even if it is just for one night,  _ he mused, suddenly feeling sad at the thought of parting ways with this person.   
  
“Tell me if I’m doing anything wrong and I’ll stop.” He replied, trying not to think of an eventual separation and trying to focus on the now, kissing her briefly. She smiled and nodded in response.   
  
She must have realized that, after a few seconds without knowing  _ what _ to do and  _ where _ exactly to go, that Squall was pretty much lost in his lack of tact and naivety when it came to dealing with the body of another person. He was a quick learner, Selphie mused, herself having a small share of two boyfriends her whole life, so she knew at least the kissing and making out part. Yet she never went too far with neither partner, so even this was a new territory to her. She hoped that the dumb romances she read and watched would help her out now, so she tried to mimic what she imagined it was “right”; she reached for the back of her lacy yellow bra and unclasped the wires, freeing her small breasts.    
  
Tossing the piece outside the bed, she could see the immediate effect that seeing her so exposed had on the young man, and how he was trying to fight the urge of kissing them, so she urged the Squall and pulled him for a sloppy, wanton kiss, their bodies moving and meeting again, bare skin touching freely without the barrier of clothing except their underwear, her now free nipples rubbing against his naked chest, his hands tentatively caressing her tights.   
  
Selphie pulled him close, small hands running on his back and the nape of his neck, and she couldn’t suppress a smile when she felt his hot mouth trailing kisses to her chin and neck, going down at an almost excruciating pace. Squall looked up to meet her encouraging gaze, they both locking eyes before Squall decided to indulge his own desires, and kissed the valley of her breasts, feeling the soft skin of her heaving chest, with each time his lips met her mounds he could feel, too, the fastening of her breathing and heartbeats. He caressed her right breast, his fingers rubbing and softly pinching the erect nipple whose skin feel slightly different from the rest of her, He let the desire and curiosity best him and closed his mouth on the other nipple, sucking and kissing hungrily as he heard her letting out a soft “Ah!” as a response, her own fingers finding his hair and obliging him to keep going as she caressed and messed with his brown locks.   
  
“S-Squall…” She breathed, and he sucked the nipple harder, licking it slowly soon after. Selphie felt a slow pressure build up between her tights and gasped; she never felt like this before and it was scary but oh-so-good she couldn’t help but wanting more of it. She jerked her hips up against his only to find his budding erection and her body tensed for a moment; This, them, was really happening and it was a scary thought even if a fleeting one. But the building desire of her own was stronger and louder than any worry, so she let herself go in his ministrations and grabbed his left hand with her right one, guiding him down on her fluttering belly and pushing it under her panties, as if telling him to touch her there. Squall looked at her with a furrowed brow of his own and despite wanting to, he realized it was a bit too daring for now. She pushed his hand further and his fingers found her creamy folds, making Squall wanting more of that touch. His fingers found their way sliding between her slit, suddenly getting coated with a wetness he wasn’t expecting but was much welcomed, even more so when Selphie moaned wantonly in response.  _ This feels so damn good,  _ he realized, as he slid his index and middle fingers in and out between her labia, and sucked her breast yet again.    
  
“Hah-ah!” She grasped, blushing deeply, and Squall realized that he was probably doing something  _ right _ and kept going teasing her soft, warm mounds with his fingers, slowly, building a pace as Selphie’s responses became louder and her body started to trash on the bed, her thrusting her hips against his hand, rubbing herself on him. He was more than happy to oblige and rubbed his fingers all around her folds, making her pant with each thrust, the pleasure building up quickly was overwhelming the young woman, who was now moaning his name like a chant, eyes closed as her body trashed in response of that pleasurable feeling she didn’t know what to do with, only that it needed to be satiated - and fast.   
  
Squall had no idea that she was so sensitive in that spot, so that was an interesting discovery for him, at the same time that was so enticing to his own senses that he couldn’t help but bask into the softness of her wet pussy, the strong scent of her sex that filled his nostrils and made his cock pulsate in anticipation; He wanted Selphie, wanted to be with her,  _ in _ her, and pleasure her as much as he could. His curiosity bested him when he removed his fingers, much to her annoyance as she quickly looked up at him with shame in her big eyes, and he sucked them, licking her wetness on himself, tasting it as he realized that  _ he wanted more.  _ That made Selphie want to hide herself and her face in pure embarrassment as she never thought of someone licking her juices like  _ that. _ _   
_ _   
_ He pulled out her panties, leaving her entirely naked on his bed, and Selphie glanced at him with both frustration and inquiry - she really wanted him to continue rubbing her pussy, she felt it pulsate with unfulfilled pleasure. Squall didn’t warn her beforehand, so he simply grabbed her by the hips, spread her legs upwards, enough that he could  _ see all of her _ , and Selphie swallowed in anticipation before he latched hungrily on her pussy, licking around and tracing with his tongue her inner labia, much to her surprise and sudden pleasure; his tongue felt immensely good and despite the shame, she wanted Squall to keep going instead.   
  
“Wh-What are you doing! AH!” She covered her mouth with one hand, closing her eyes shut when Squall closed his mouth around her folds and started to suck and lick them, savoring her taste.    
  
He stopped with a genuine look of inquiry on his face, brows slightly arched as he got worried that she wasn’t liking it at all “I thought you would like this. Should I stop it then? Is it hurting you?”    
  
“N-No… Not at all. It feels great…!” She admitted, feeling her face and body getting hotter with each minute passed.    
  
“Good. Can I continue then?” He asked and she simply nodded in response, and Squall didn’t stop to think twice before going back to his ministrations.    
  
It felt so good that Selphie tried to replicate the same as she did before when he was rubbing his fingers on her, and thrust her hips up to his face slowly, building her pace and trying to match his own, which made her gasp louder much to her surprise.    
  
“Yes… yes this feels good-! Oh, Squall!” He squeezed her buttocks in response, sucking her clit without having a good idea of how this would affect her “OH! This is so good! Hah, Squall!!” With each time she chanted his name in a melodic voice, he felt more and more compelled to suck her and harder, his own painful erection urging him to keep going as he felt himself dripping, until she - unbeknownst to both of them - reached her peak and her juices flowed to his mouth, who obliged and licked and drinked everything she had to give to him.    
  
Embarrassed with what just happened, she covered her mouth with both hands and looked at him with teary eyes, of both pleasure and shame. Squall locked his gaze on hers and quickly stopped everything he was doing to check on her the second time that night.    
  
“You alright?” And she nodded in response, still very much ashamed of herself.   
  
“I’m fine, it’s just… I never imagined it could be this way…” She muttered and he frowned.   
  
“How so?”   
  
“This... well…  _ good.” _ She finally admitted it and Squall let out a sigh of relief. He, too, was enjoying this, feeling it was all great so far, but he wanted to be sure she was having a good time just as he was.   
  
“We can stop here if you want to-” He said, trying to ignore the painfulness of his own lack of release. But maybe she wouldn’t want to do it, so Squall needed her to be sure.   
  
“I’m ready.” Selphie embraced him then, closing the distance between their bodies and pushing her hips towards his bobbing erection. Her breathing was still ragged from her orgasm, but she urged Squall to have his own share of pleasure.    
  
He freed his cock from his boxers, pulling the clothing piece down to his knees, and awkwardly positioned himself between her legs. Selphie helped him, guiding the young man with her delicate hand until they both found her entrance. She tensed at first, but the welcoming wetness of their bare skin touching in such an intimate way brushed aside her worries; Selphie placed her free hand on the back of his head, arching her body from bed, reaching for a kiss. Squall leaned in and closed their distance, and he grunted with pleasure on her lips, reveling on the intimacy they shared that moment, her wet pussy welcoming him in as he made his way into her slowly, taking his time. For a short second, Squall thought he would come right away, suddenly overwhelmed with softness of her inner walls adjusting to his cock, but he stopped, panting against Selphie’s parted mouth, both locking gaze in what felt an eternity.    
  
_ This, all of this _ , felt way too good to be truth, and Squall feared that at any moment he would wake up from his delirium, that he has to be dreaming after such a long, tiresome day, and in no way in hell he would be compensated for all his years of coldness surrounding his life willingly. He himself was the only one to blame in the first place, he knew, but he couldn’t help but wanting to hide from everything: his feelings, people, the world, all of it. All the trouble that came with them.  _ But she was still there. Looking at him, sharing something deep with him, even if for a short while.  _ Selphie was as real as he was, and Squall couldn’t help but feel deeply thankful for all she was offering, all that he was being given, all that he, too, wanted to give for so long and was trapped by his own beliefs.   
  
It was a scary thought, of losing himself on someone else, and that’s why he avoided even physical relationships, never pursuing sex until  _ now. _ Because he knew, Squall knew that the moment he allowed himself to share such intimacy, he would be lost. And all of his efforts of protecting himself would be, too, down the drain.    
  
Yet, with each thrust, each kiss, each moan, he couldn’t bother. It felt too good for him to not give himself into it, baring his very soul to this girl, whom he only met in a week. What did she have in her that made this possible? Or was it he that was too desperate for so long that it allowed her to enter in his life in such a way? Even if they parted ways tomorrow, there was no way he would forget her. She would be a part of hms forever, engraved in his body and memory, and strangely enough, he was going to be part of hers as well.   
  
They both embraced each other tightly as Squall released into her, burying his face on her shoulder, moaning her name in a deep voice. The young couple remained like this for a while as he softened inside her, bodies intertwined, adoration in their locked gaze and short panting as they both tried to reclaim their breathing. He pulled out and Selphie coaxed him to rest his head on her chest. Squall obliged, finally -  _ finally _ \- having a moment of true rest in that entire week, his body relaxing as she caressed his scalp gently, giving in to a sound sleep, too tired fight against the warmth in those small arms that surrounded him.   
  
  



End file.
